Emotional cacophony to Inner peace : How Krittika found her way back
We all have gone through college years and we know the drill, don’t we? The lectures, the friends, the parties, the sleepovers and ah, the endless drama that comes with it. Hookups and broken relationships are a bonus with academic pressure and politics during college fests.
Most of us take all of it with a pinch of salt, and when we look back, all we are left with is happy memories.
That’s the usual story. What will be unravelled now is not the usual college nostalgia but a story of how one transformed from being an overly sensitive and emotionally troubled college newbie to someone ready to take on the world. This is a story of strength, courage and letting go of whatever it is that holds you back.
Krittika Kannojia shifted from the beautiful, serene city of Dehradun to Viman Nagar- the most happening part of Pune and joined the Symbiosis Centre for Media & Communication to study Mass Communication.
Full of fervour and the urge to explore, college started off well for her until she started searching for love.
Love not working out is common- and everyone would tell her that it’s high time she grew a thick skin. But we are all made differently right? Krittika had a sensitive heart and she knew it.
Relationships can be detrimental when one person values them and the other doesn’t. Casual dating, no matter how fun it may be, might turn into a toxic emotional quicksand- the more you try to step out of it, the more strongly it pulls you in. Struggling to run away from her own feelings, she tried finding solace in her best friend from Dehradun. He was there to listen, to support and absorb all her fears. Hours on the phone turned into a deep friendship. But it soon turned from support to emotional dependency- which didn’t make her stronger.
On her journey to find love, she strived to choose between commitment and casual dating, between emotional attachment and detachment, between genuine efforts and convenience and finally between what others want from her and what she wants from herself. The choices were tough. She stumbled. And difficult college friendships, a strenuous academic curriculum and health challenges made her path full of obstacles which seemed too high to cross or jump over.
Every day would be a struggle, as she was forced to juggle everything with a smile on her face.
College days didn’t get better but they came to an end. And Krittika was broken. To her core. Something within her had given up. On love and the beauty of it. On friendship and the happiness that comes with it. But there was one thing which was still alive within her- her faith in herself and her abilities.
She went back home to Dehradun and found her vision back- the vision to make it big in the media industry. And her passion to hear stories and tell them to the world through her camera lens. She made up her mind and embarked on a journey of making documentaries. She just had a small team, a camera, and her creativity to rely on.
Apart from her packed shoot schedule, she also organised a ‘Pride Parade March’ in Dehradun. School & college students flaunted rainbow colours on their flags, cheeks, and placards as they marched to spread awareness on LGBTQ rights.
She kept herself engaged but in the back of her mind, the emotional damage still troubled her. She was doing too many things to keep herself away from negativity, but she still couldn’t access her inner peace. She was turning into a bitter person, had started pushing people away and building very high, sturdy walls of defence around her. There would be times when her anger would get the better of her and she would blurt out things that she didn’t even mean. Her closest friends in Dehradun stayed by her side and instead of drifting away, decided to lend an ear to listen- and really understand what she was going through.
College life had been hard on her- and she wanted to heal, but couldn’t. The wounds were still fresh. She started having panic attacks. And that’s when she realised that she needed help.
Her close friends Anjali and Rihen did not dismiss her temper tantrums as ‘drama’ as most would but looked beyond it. What they saw were sorrow, restlessness and a broken heart.
Krittika spoke to them willingly, poured her emotions out and realised her mistakes herself- just by sharing her bottled up feelings that were eating her up from the inside and creating a void that she was desperately trying to fill.
She made up her mind and decided to go for therapy. Her therapist advised that Sujok therapy would help her flush out the negative energy within her.
Sujok therapy is similar to acupressure- the pressure points are on the palms and the feet that represent all the organs and parts of the body.
And voila! It worked! Krittika confessed that there were times when it was painful physically, mainly because there was so much oozing out of her. During some sessions, she would break down and tears would pour down her cheeks uncontrollably.
The sessions not only healed her, but helped her think clearly about herself, her ambitions and what she wanted from life. She learnt to cut toxic people out of her life, manage her emotions which no longer overwhelmed her and stay focused on what matters to her the most- her career.
She realised that love cannot be forced- it flows and she will welcome it with open arms when it makes her happy and rejects it if it starts to harm her.
She’s decided to live life on her own terms- and not let ANYONE tell her how to go about it. She holds the reins now and she alone will control where she heads.
She is preparing for an internship with the Discovery channel at present. Life’s not been kind in the past, but she’s learnt that she has to be kind to herself. And eventually, everything falls in place. You just need some courage, some strength and a few people who’ll stay by your side, no matter what.