Happy Independence Day: My freedom BY Me FOR Me
Deep inner freedom is the most cherished of feelings we can gift ourselves. It starts with being true to ourselves. Being true to ourselves implies being authentic and free of all circumstances and everyone who wants us to be something or someone else. Our true self is love, being in the flow, having meaning in our lives, becoming a better person who is strong and exercises self-control.
Inner strength is an ongoing process that empowers us in making ourselves a priority, taking ownership of our life and committing ourselves to be our true self. When we are strong, we set ourselves free by letting go of all entanglements that can cause us potential harm or prevent us from advancing with integrity and balance in our lives.
My Freedom By Me:
In order to be our true self, taking ownership starts with giving ourselves a priority and working on ourselves through –
- Organized Thoughts: When our mind is not organized, it manifests itself on the outside reflecting in our relationships, our careers, social connections and all other aspects of our life. This chaos can limit our lives.
Freeing ourselves from these self-limiting thoughts starts with being self-aware. Letting go as a daily practice and building organized thoughts sets us free. Sitting daily for 10 minutes in the morning with self to plan our day and 10 minutes in the night to reflect on our thoughts, releasing all those that restrict us and integrating our learnings are powerful self-awareness techniques.
- Personal Boundaries: Personal Boundaries are crucial because they prevent us from becoming entangled. A healthy relationship will be sustainable, when we are able to honour ourselves first, nurturing our self-esteem. When our boundary is intact, all relationships we build will be on mutual respect, trust and growth.
Personal boundaries protect our sense of personal identity and guard against being overwhelmed by demands from self as well as others. Beyond maintaining a sense of self, boundaries set mutual expectations on how we treat ourselves and indicate to others how we want to be treated. Boundaries prevent us from emotional onslaughts, getting resentful and eventually throwing up a barrier, which can trigger our defense mechanisms.
Clarifying our personal boundaries to ourselves first, sets a strong foundation in staying free. Our emotions and thoughts serve as a compass to where boundary lines need to be drawn. Emotional discomfort may indicate an area where a boundary is needed, while pleasurable emotions let us know we are on the right track.
- Growth Mindset: When we believe can grow by ourselves, we put in extra time and effort to make it possible. Believing our talents can be developed through hard work, good strategies, and input from others, we have a growth mindset. We tend to achieve more in life, experiencing freedom as we grow.
We are open to receiving information, processing our thoughts, emotions and interacting with others in an empowered state to discern with wisdom what is beneficial for us.
My Freedom For Me:
Once we start working on our freedom, the next phase is to maintain our freedom and constantly work on staying in that state. This comes with :
- Being Present: Being in the moment frees us to experience life more fully. We are able to connect with our gifts and tap into our potential. This comes with regular daily practice.
When we practice something regularly, we become good at it. It becomes our state of being rather than a task. Practice, practice, and being present will become natural. Here’s how to do it: whatever we do, right now, we learn to focus completely on doing that one thing. This state of oneness
- Communicating our boundaries: Once our boundaries are defined, state them clearly to yourself and practice it daily. When we speak our truth, we face our fears and express our thoughts and feelings freely.
Next, we have “boundary conversations” with all who we interact with. These conversations manifest through our behaviours and actions. Saying ‘I feel hurt and misunderstood in this conversation’ rather than, ‘You made me feel hurt because of the way you talked to me.’ The former is simply expressing an emotion; the latter is blaming others for the hurt feelings.
When we speak this way with those who upset us or push our boundaries, internal healing occurs. When we show up for ourselves, we provide an opportunity for those around us to show up as well. This way, we exchange energies freely.
- Taking Responsibility: Similar to holding a non-blaming stance when enforcing our boundaries, it’s important to take responsibility for our role in our relationships and exchange. Part of the reason we have boundaries is so we take care of our own needs rather than waiting for others to solve all our problems.
- Being Accountable: Accountability eliminates the time and effort we spend on distracting activities and other unproductive behaviours. When we are accountable for our actions, we grow in our strength, empowering ourselves to make our decisions.
Being free, we create joy in our heart which flows through our body, we naturally think joyfully and positively. Creativity flows and we feel more inspired, more energized and passionate about being alive. Starting from us, when we feel this way, we inspire and uplift all around us.
Anu Sachar is a Thriive-Verified Life Coaching Expert who is in a happy space as a Psychologist, Certified Coach. Her clients include- Children, Young adults, Entrepreneurs, Corporate leaders, Creative people, Start-ups, Professionals, and Home-makers.