Who can forget that iconic scene from Jab We Met where Kareena Kapoor as Geet announces: “Main apni favourite hoon!” (I am my most favorite person). If this is not a proclamation of self-love, then what is! But have you stopped to think whether you are your own favourite? Are you really into you? Are you loving yourself enough? No doubt, we may have questioned what self-love really means.
But here are some sure signs that you are not loving yourself enough:
1. You are in a co-dependent relationship
When your partner becomes your whole and sole reason for existence, this is a sure sign of low self-esteem and lack of self-love. You give and give without any reciprocation. This is a toxic situation and can never bring happiness, or even peace to either stakeholder in the relationship. Break away and begin nurturing yourself today.
2. You are facing addiction issues
Too much consumption of food, tv, drinks, drugs or even digital media points to a situation which clearly says you come last for yourself. Would you treat your favemost person this way? You have to keep in mind that you are the most important person in your life and that you are enough. Use affirmations if you must to get this message across to yourself.
3. You continue to remain in an abusive situation
A sense of low self-worth keeps you chained to an environment and people who do not respect you. You might be afraid that breaking away would take you to a situation that is worse that the current one. This belief does not take into consideration your skills, talents and the will to survive. When you love yourself unconditionally, the gruesome truth of the situation will be revealed to you.
4. You make no Me-time
How would you pamper your favourite person? Would you not take them to the movies and buy them nice things? Are you doing the same for yourself? Perhaps you would like to take a walk on the beach at sunset or take a day off from work and just read a book? Do these soul-satisfying things for the special YOU.
5. You indulge in negative self-talk
Stop and listen to how you talk to yourself. Are you being kind or cruel to yourself? Louise Hay said,“You have been criticizing yourself for years, and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.” Stand in front of the mirror and look into your eyes. Smile and say “I love you” and mean it. See the magic flow into your life when you begin loving yourself.
6. You care too much what others think of you
When we feel we are not good enough, we seek attention and approval from others. But this is soul-sapping in the long run. Remember what Eleanor Roosevelt said:“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Try journaling or writing the morning pages to help you resolve your self-confidence issues.