Long-distance relationship? Make it work
I could easily write a thesis on why I believe in long-distance relationships. But to say that making them work is easy, will be a white lie. Every relationship is going to test you at the end of the day. Is it the flames of insecurity involved in a long-distance relationship or the fear of lacking control of each other’s lives, it is going to tire you. But what is really important is what you want to achieve from it all. Let’s face it- nobody can live in long-distance relationships forever. But for the period that you’ll stay apart, here are 5 MUST-FOLLOW tips to make it work:
- Discuss your expectations: In any relationship, make sure you draw lines on expectations. The crux of any relationship lies in its expectations, desires, and goals. When you decide to go on with your relationship in spite of the distance, talk about what could make or break them. Lay down standing rules that can create troubles in your relationship. For example, no boozing with strangers after 1 am or say, no watching movies with so-and-so- basically chalk out what is exclusive to the two of you and make sure to follow them. If you can’t, make sure you let the person know why too!
Set goals straight. How long is the relationship going to be long-distance? What do you expect from the relationship?
- Communicate: Talk to each other but don’t overdo it. Talk to each other about how the day progressed or what you have been doing, who you met- but make sure it isn’t like some reporting project you ought to submit. Find a balance in between. Talk about what is silly and that which is important too, do not avoid or overdo the talking. To make things better, send pictures, videos or audio clips from time to time. Try to erase the distance in a way that communication doesn’t seem difficult.
- Be honest: Talk about your fears, goals, accomplishments, feelings, emotions and all the things that make you insecure or secure in any situation. Tell him/her that you’re trying to keeping away the distance part but also inform them that this is the right thing to do, at the moment. Talk about all your secret desires and those not-so-fancy thoughts too. Just make sure to know each other as much as possible.
- Keep them posted: When you stay in a land where you have to mend things alone, you will feel a bit anxious about everything. Likewise, when your partner isn’t around, you’re going to get super worried. That’s why you must keep each other posted about what is happening in your life. Keep each other updated about family, friends, important dates or meeting. Let the other person feel like he/she is part of your life.
- Stay positive: While it is true that you want the other person to know about your growing insecurities, don’t bog them down. Don’t constantly tell the person about how difficult this is, instead try telling them that you’ll make it work.
Like I said already, it’s not going to be a cake’s walk. Wait, but who knows, if you hold on a bit patiently, maybe you can bake the cake and eat it too!