What the heck is self-love? We asked Spiritual Coach & Mentor Greg Friedman and you’ll be surprised to know what he said!
Self-love posts get highest ‘likes’. But what is it exactly? We asked for some answers and got them from Greg Friedman
What is Love?
It’s such a huge question. It has been explored by scientists, philosophers, and you and I. Love is what we are all looking for. Love is a need as vital as air, food or water, but what is it? And most of the time we are thinking of loving another when we pose the question.
But how can we love another unless we learn to love ourselves?
Rumi says, “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”
So what are the largest barriers to our self-love?
We, as humans, often refuse to see what is going on here and now and instead, we default based on patterns of both happiness and trauma from our past.
Love is being present
Are we willing to be present with ourselves and look at our own reflection without turning away, judging or criticizing? Unfortunately, the answer to that is often no, we are not willing to recognize ourselves, to be with ourselves, to be present with ourselves without fading or fixing, or judging.
To love ourselves is to forgive ourselves
Forgive for what? I don’t know but you do. We all have little things that we don’t embrace. Little places that we find dark and cold within and if we can beckon those areas of ourselves over and wrap them in the warm embrace of forgiveness then we begin to love ourselves in a healthier, happier, more accepting manner. Then we can love another similarly and also open ourselves to receive from another in a happier, more embracing manner as well.
Self-love is recognition of ourselves
Our essence is always love. To me, Namaste means the essence of me sees and recognizes the essence of you in this moment and acts accordingly. Namaste’s literal translation in Sanskrit is “Nama” (to bow), “As” (I), and “Te” (you). Put it all together, and it means “I bow to you,” therefore I bow to love.
One of my favorite and oft quoted sayings is, “Everything on this planet is either love or a call for love”.
Self-love is an act of courage and surrender
With love, there is no room for fear or ego or suffering, there is only now, this moment and the present moment is always filled with the effervescence of the beauty of love.
Will you choose to forgive, will you choose to love, the invitation is always there.
Show yourself some love every day in some way:
- Look at yourself in the mirror and say aloud, “I love you.”
- Book yourself for a massage or a Zumba class.
- Indulge yourself with that special something you’ve been putting off (but don’t break the bank, that’s despair, not self-love).
- Give expression to your creative urge: paint, sing, sew, or cook something new.
About Greg Friedman
Greg Friedman is a modern version of that which has existed in every culture, a Spiritual Guide and Mentor. He builds bridges and helps clear paths, in part, by taking the ancient wisdom of indigenous cultures and making it applicable to us in our everyday lives.